Archive for the ‘fattie pig fatties’ Category

Italy Still Facist

Saturday, February 6th, 2010

Italy, a nation full of people that love their country, is trying something no state has before. The Italian government has teamed up with McDonalds to create the McITALY. This pridefully patriotic burger is made with all Italian ingredients, and the colors are that of the Italian flag (don’t know where brown fits in, perhaps it’s assumed that the flag is shit, anyways.)

“We’re out to defend our identity and the ‘Made in Italy’ trademark,” Agriculture Minister Luca Zaia said in a statement, adding that they were trying to “promote the taste of Italy,” by giving an “imprint of Italian flavors to our youngsters,” he said.
What that means is: “we want to take the fun out of eating cheeseburgers.”

The burger comes with a choice of artichoke spread and Asiago cheese or onion, lettuce and smoked pancetta. Bring on the WORST red and green flavors to mix with a BURGER ever.

Yum, eat up!

fat fat fat americans.

Monday, April 6th, 2009

CHICAGO (AP) -  We all know that Americans have an obeisty problem, but here’s a bit htat may be news to you:  1 in 5 American 4 year olds is obese.  Not chunky, not baby fat, really fucking FAT.  [I note: American Indians, Blacks, and Hispanics have an even higher rate, with Indians coming in as #1 fatties, 1 in 3.]

The study was authored by Temple and Ohio State Universities.  They found that almost 13 percent of Asian children were obese, along with 16 percent of whites, almost 21 percent of blacks, 22 percent of Hispanics, and 31 percent of American Indians.

The researchers did not examine reasons for the disparities, but others offered several theories.  Mostly, that poor people can’t afford real food.

More Cushion for the Pushin. Now on TV!

Tuesday, March 31st, 2009

Fox has a new series, “More to Love,” which I must admit absolutely disgusts me.

Teaming with “The Bachelor” producers, the new dating competition is focused on “average-looking” people.  But not just any “average” people, FAT average people!

The series is billed as the first “dating show for the rest of us,” throwing open its doors to overweight contestants.

Now who in the HELL wants to watch fat sluts get nekkid, I ask?

McDonalds Shoot-Up: I’m lovin’ it.

Tuesday, March 31st, 2009

An angry drive-up customer unable to get a Big Mac has been arrested for shooting at the window.  At about 2 a.m, the driver pulled in to a McD’s in Salt Lake city to order food from the dinner menu.  He was told that they were only serving breakfast.  Deeming this an unacceptable option, the female driver drove to the second window.

Two men got out of hte car, one with a sawed-off shotgun.  He fired once or twice into the window, hopped back into the car, and they drove off.

The shooter was described as Polynesian, 6 feet 1 inch tall, with long hair in a ponytail, a beanie cap and a white T-shirt, police said.

No one was injured in the shooting.

Campus Cop lifts pastries. Every day.

Sunday, January 25th, 2009

State police say an upstate New York college campus policeman was helping himself to free pastries at a local convenience store.

The Valero Nice N Easy offers free coffee to any police officer in uniform.

Sgt. Steve Brody of the Morrisville State College University Police stopped daily to buy a newspaper and pick up a free cup of coffee. He also routinely stuffed a pastry into his coat.
Brody is now accused of taking about $30 worth of pastries over at least 17 separate occasions.

Brody, 55, of Morrisville, was ticketed for petit larceny. Troopers say they have surveillance videos.

Sandwiches…..not healthier than a Big Mac?

Saturday, July 26th, 2008

They are widely believed to be the healthy alternative to fast food for those eating on the go.
But sandwiches and rolls sold by chains can contain as much salt as 18 bags of chips and 80 per cent more saturated fat than a Big Mac, a British investigation claims today.

Secret filming at a factory making sandwiches for convenience stores and garages from London to Manchester showed rubbish apparently falling into a bucket of fillings and stale pittas taken from a bin to be filled and sent out.
Staff seemingly failed to wash their hands, food was thrown on the floor and the factory had a problem with mice.

Subway’s six inch Meatball Marinara contains 4.7g of salt - the equivalent of 11.75 packs of ready salted crisps.

But its 12inch version contains a staggering 7.2g of salt - as much as is found in 18 packs of salted crips and 20 per cent more than an adult should eat in an entire day.

Compare this to the 9g of saturated fat in a Big Mac, and 2.27g of salt.

The Food Standards Agency has been calling on the catering industry to change recipes to cut down on salt and saturated fat. The nation’s average daily salt intake is 8.6g - 43per cent above the recommended limit of 6g.
[Wonder that the American is? 4 g. American standards say to limit sat intake to 2.3 grams, WAY lower than 6. So I am confused. But hey, just reportin what I find. Not a scientist. YET.]

High salt intake is linked to high blood pressure, strokes and heart attacks.

Which are the worst contributors on your ‘wich? Cheese, bacon, ham, butter and mayonnaise

You can Have Bit tits in Britain, but It’ll cost Ya!

Saturday, July 12th, 2008

The Marks & Spencer chain does something that few places do…..levees fees for DD bras. Protest groups have already formed to force the chain to return to selling all bras, all sizes, for one price.
M&S put a 2 pound surcharge on bras sizes DD-G.

At least they sell bras that big. And lets be real, there is a LOT more fabric used.
M&S says that thier construction is expensive, because extra “innovation and technology” is necessary to support massive tits.

A spokesman says: ‘There are 25 to 30 components in every single bra, and so there might be more in those for bigger-busted women and they also need stronger straps.
‘Larger breasted women want to buy the same pretty bras that their friends who are a different size can buy, and to make this possible-the bra needs to be made in a slightly different way.’

Most British women wear bras of a DD size or larger. M&S sells some designs in sizes ranging from a 30DD to 42J cup. WHAT? How fat are they?!?

Chestnut wins in closest match in Nathan’s history!

Tuesday, July 8th, 2008

NEW YORK (Reuters) - U.S. defending champion Joey Chestnut won the
annual Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest on Friday by downing 64
hot dogs in a competition that stretched into a first-ever overtime.

Chestnut, of San Jose, California, defeated six-time champion Takeru
Kobayashi of Japan in the annual event held at New York’s Coney Island
beach.

The two were tied at 59 hot dogs a piece at the end of the regulation
10 minutes, forcing a sudden death overtime to determine which man
could eat five more hotdogs in the shortest time.

Organizers said it was the first overtime in the contest’s history.

The winner receives $10,000, a mustard yellow belt and a year’s supply
of hotdogs from Nathan’s, which began in 1916 with a small Coney
Island hot dog stand and now sells food products globally.

Man, I gotta start competitive eating. It’s def worth the 10,000 buckaroonees

Fat Fucking Soldiers in MY army?!?!? I didn’t think so.

Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008

What’s the Army policy on fat people? They’re not particularly welcome. The Army’s basic recruitment standard is linked to a candidate’s body-fat percentage, measured by an equation involving height and the circumferences of the abdomen, neck, and—for women—hips. If they’re 27 years old or younger, men must have a body-fat percentage below 26 percent, while women must be below 32 percent.

Typically, however, recruits are first judged against a BMI table. The upper limits on the Army’s weight table are slightly more lenient than the definition of “overweight” provided by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: For example, a 21-year-old male recruit who is 5 foot 10 and weighs 190 pounds would be a bit overweight under CDC guidelines but not above the Army’s weight maximum. (You can also be too skinny to be recruited—the minimum body-mass index (PDF) is 19.) If candidates pass muster according to the table, they don’t need to go through a body-fat measurement.

Because of increasing obesity rates in the United States, the Army’s standards now disqualify a large percentage of the population. A study conducted by Army researchers found that 27.1 percent of the 18-year-olds who applied to join the military in 2006 were overweight—up from 22.8 percent in 1993. Weight is by far the most common medical reason why potential recruits are rejected from serving. And while prospective enlistees can try to make weight before their official screening—often with the support of eager recruiters—the pool of eligible young adults remains smaller than the Army would like.

As a result, the Army has tried to find ways to admit recruits who fall outside the typical boundaries but are still likely to succeed in the service. In particular, the Assessment of Recruit Motivation and Strength—known as ARMS—has become a source of automatic waivers for recruits with a body-fat percentage up to 30 percent for men and 36 percent for women. The ARMS process requires participants to complete a five-minute modified “Harvard step” test—which involves stepping onto a low platform 120 times per minute. After that, applicants must do a certain number of pushups in one minute—at least 15 for men and four for women. Applicants who qualify through the ARMS test get a free pass on being overweight, but they do have to get themselves in shape within a year of entering active duty. Early research suggests that recruits who get ARMS waivers have attrition rates similar to enlistees who enter the Army without a waiver.

Once a recruit makes weight, he’s expected to stay slim. At a minimum, Army personnel are required to take a physical-fitness test every six months, which includes a weight screening. If a soldier is above the maximum body-fat percentage (PDF) for his age, he must take part in a “weight control” program that includes a workout regimen and nutritional counseling. While under an “overweight flag,” soldiers can’t attend a professional military school, be promoted, or even re-enlist.

And yes, you can eat yourself out of the Army: If you don’t eventually make satisfactory progress after being placed in the weight-control program, a commander can initiate “separation proceedings” leading to an eventual discharge.

a list of foods so bad for you you may actually coil in horror and die.

Sunday, April 20th, 2008

Worst Appetizer: Chili’s Awesome Blossom
calories: 2,710
fat203g
Chili’s is all sorts of wrong. I love the place, but you could literally shit a rat after eating there.
Now I know why - it’s because they pack a week’s worth of calories into your dinner.
THIS IS AN ONION. What do you have to do to alter an onion into a day’s worth of food? Yuck.

Breakfast of Caloric Champions: Denny’s Smoked Sausage Slam
calories:1,480
fat:88 saturated fat:30
sodium: 4340
carbs: 118
cholesterol: 610
Denny’s is good for two things: late-night, drinking induced eating benders, and the subsequent heart failure. 2 eggs, covered in chopped bacon, ham, sausage…”cheddar” cheese. Doesn’t sound like enough? Have no fear, that’s just the first plate of this meal. You’ve also got your meat dish…2 strips bacon, 2 sausages, hash browns, and oh, yeah, pancakes…..2 of em. DOUBLE yuck.

Viva Mexica: Chipotle Barbacoa Super Burrito
calories:1493
fat:68 sat. fat22.5
sodium: 2644
carbs:151
cholesterol:144
I love burritos. They are one of the two things I could be happy eating forever (sushi being the other) So though I know its gross, I think I would eat Special K for my other 2 meals to make this work.

Money Well Spent: Carl’s Jr. Bacon Cheese Six Dollar Burger
calories”:1070
fat:76 sat. fat:30
sodium: 1910
carbs: 50
cholesterol: 170
Bam. A whole day’s worth of food(fat technically-not calories), for six bucks. Second world countries drool in jealousy.

Just Wrong, Yet So Right, Mate: Outback Steakhouse Aussie Cheese Fries
calories: 2900
fat: 182
cholesterol:240
I have never had these, but I Saw a pick and almost ate my own foot. WOW. Ham and cheese on fries. Those Aussies are on to something. Just…eat slowly, and over hte course of 24 hours, cus this side dish will do you in for the day.